If I had a dollar for every time I used to think that..
People see you as confident and secure, when all you see is someone who is faking it and can’t get their stuff together.
You feel worthless and flawed.
You are constantly bombarded with curated images of people’s “perfect” lives, bodies, families, and businesses, and you think to yourself that everyone is living a way better life than I am.
Adverse life experiences can really screw with our self-esteem. Trauma does a number on how we view ourselves. Childhood trauma skews the mold in which our self-view is shaped and set.
Maybe you think you are toxic. Or maybe you feel like you asked for bad things to happen to you and for people to do bad things to you.
What I can tell you is that everyone suffers from insecurities. Nobody’s life is perfect. But you probably know that already. The thing is, when you are living day-to-day without addressing your mental health and your past (or ongoing) trauma, self-esteem goes down the toilet.
It’s a vicious cycle, this low self-esteem crap. It leads to negative or low expectations of yourself and others, which causes you to put forth low effort, leading to high anxiety, failure, self-blame and reinforces the thought that you continue to suck at everything.
What if you can live with honest and accurate awareness of your failures and have a self-compassionate acceptance of them?
You know, embrace the fact that you are human and have compassion and empathy towards yourself and others?
Healthy self-esteem is acceptance, being more comfortable in your skin, capable of meeting life’s challenges, and it allows you to see others in a realistic and positive light without constantly comparing yourself to them.